Is it possible to fall in love with a blogger I've never met before?

Yes.


Hyperbole and a Half, by Allie Bosh

I might be a little late to this party, but this blog is funniest goddamn thing I've run across in a very, very long time. Allie is a multi-talented wunderkind, able to write hilariously disturbing and oddly touching stories and wield MS Paint like it's a weapon.

She's like Don Hertzfeldt, but with more heart.

And she's hot.

I don't even remember how I stumbled across it, but I'm now thoroughly addicted. I want to blame this on the stomach flu that's kept me in bed most of the day, but I've literally gotten nothing done today beyond reading and rereading her posts, perusing the photos on her Facebook page, and secretly plotting how I'm going to move up to Montana and somehow break up her and her boyfriend (what's his name? Duncan? Whatever).

Yes, I am now officially an Internet stalker.

So in the interest of regaining a small piece of my dignity, I'm going to try to pretend that this post isn't merely a desperate ploy for Allie's attention and mention a few of the other blogs and websites that get me through my day.

Fuck You, Penguin

www.fupenguin.com

Sadly, I think this one might be dead. There haven't been any posts since November of last year.

But who doesn't want to yell at pandas and tell them they're stupid? I know I do.

If you haven't seen it, it's worth going through the archives.

Lamebook

www.lamebook.com

This one is alternatingly hilarious, disturbing, and deeply depressing. Sometimes while reading it I'll hurt myself laughing and sometimes I'll tremble in fear and weep for the future of humanity. Usually when I'm done I feel really horrible about myself and the rest of my species.

But it's like crack. I just can't seem to quit.

And speaking of crack...

Cracked

www.cracked.com

Probably my most visited site on the Internet (second to Wikipedia, of course). Funny, weird, and surprisingly informative. I enjoy the videos (particularly the ones by Michael Swain) and the web comics, but it's the lists that keep me coming back over and over again.

Some of my favorites:

5 Popular Zombie Survival Tactics (That Will Get You Killed)
The 7 Most Horrifying Museums on Earth
The 17 Most Unintentionally Hilarious Propaganda Posters

Most of these websites can't really be defended as anything other than a waste of time, but I've found that Cracked is actually great for research and has inspired more than a few story ideas. So suck it.

The Daily Beast

www.thedailybeast.com

Okay, so maybe now I'm feeling a little defensive about my Internet habits. But I do go to this one regularly for my politics and news fix. It's not as up-to-the-minute as The Huffington Post or Politico, but that only gives it the added bonus of having articles that are actually well-written and contextualized.

Playground of Doom

playgroundofdoom.blogspot.com

Hey, I know this guy!

Doesn't matter. I still genuinely get excited every time Dusty posts a new blog. It's like getting a little snark-filled Christmas present in my Facebook inbox.

It doesn't hurt that Dusty and I have similar sensibilities (Inception aside). But I love how he approaches reviews of things as diverse as Machete, Five Easy Pieces, and The Hand with the same snap wit and lack of pretension (a lesson I should probably take for myself), and that he's not afraid to turn the snark on himself.

And -- sorry Dusty -- he's also the ultimate contrarian. He literally does not give a shit what you think. Awesome.

For some other cool blogs written by people I know, check out Cinewise by Gurur Sarbanoglu; A Modern Girl's Guide to Surviving the Apocalypse by Mandy Connor, Dana Horgan, and Bridget Tyler; and The New Jonny Transit Blog by Jon Curtis.